Wednesday, August 29, 2007

But I don't feel tardy

Ok. There were some ants all up in my space today. They were in a line and shit. I sprayed them with Raid (RAID!) and now my room smells like death. If you don't know the meaning of the phrase "sickly sweet", then snort some Raid and you'll know. After I nuked them and cleaned up their carcasses, I tried to find their origin, which was, surprise surprise, a hole in the wall. So now when I look at my walls, I see them as some sort of teeming, pulsating collective organism and I totally throw up a little even though that sounds kind of psychedelic and cool.

I've noticed that my hit count has included several international visitors, and when I investigated further, I found that most of them stumbled upon my blog by searching for Kermit. I don't really know what to do with that information. Except state it here. Welcome, hola, and gesundheit.

I told my class today about my conflicted feelings about The Hills, they understood, and, bless 'em, they didn't judge. B-ful asked me to expound on the representation of the male within The Hills, and I tell you, I am stumped. Flummoxed. Spencer Whinyface and his merry band of morons is one thing, but Justin-Bobby? Really? I understand that your viewers are the same ones who listen to Maroon 5 and have sweatpants with words written on the butt, but c'mon, MTV, give your demographic a tiny bit of credit and don't introduce a CLOWN as a potential love interest. That guy totally got his PhD in clown from the University of Clown in Clownsville and I would categorize his style as "homeless chic." His hair should have its own show. ("Unwashed: The Story of Justin-Bobby's Curls") Stay tuned to see if I can dig my way out of the Justin-Bobby thought puzzle.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know empty compliments are useless, but I also know they're nice to receive, so: You are so funny I don't know what to do with myself.

And wait... what's this "class" business?

Anonymous said...

As they say on The Hills, oh em gee! I love it when you post, I love it even more when my nagging plays any small part in it. Especially when you make mention of Justin-Bobby. He's like a faux-Jordan Catalano, he's like Scott Stapp is to Eddie Vedder.

Publius said...

"Homeless chic"? Don't you know it's called "Derelicte"?

Publius said...

Get back after it woman.

How are you going to start this blog and then desert it after two weeks.

Evidently cheese fries are still LAME.